Shhhh! Don't tell Santa, but we, at sex+ have news for you...you can be naughty and nice! One of the best things about sex-positive folks practising conscious sexuality is that, when it is done well, there is a clarity of understanding and connection that allows for you to explore all the ways you want to be 'naughty' whilst remaining 'nice', steering clear of the difficult outcomes that 'naughtiness' can give rise to in less sex-positive realms.
In this release we have our feature interview with Majeste – exploring the further reaches of ‘naughtiness’ whilst still staying ‘nice’. She also touches on the subtleties of sexual energy in play – those that are more difficult to convey and which only really get expanded when both parties are clear about their desires and their roles. She also points to another great enabler to expanded sensual and sexual experiences – connection, and, more specifically, connection through communication. Equipping ourselves with knowledge and then practising to grow our abilities is a great way to help ourselves and others to experience the best of what ‘naughty’ play has to offer.
Here are some seasonal pointers to upping your 'naughty' quotient whilst staying 'nice' during the holiday season:
- Don't use the excuse of mistletoe (or wine) to skimp on consent. And remember, snowmen melt in non-consensual hugs....
- Be prepared for and accept that consent may change at any time.
- Make sure to communicate everything clearly. More is better than less when it comes to communication.
- Winter is a time for rest and gathering of your nuts (in a metaphorical or literal sense), take some time out to do self-care, eat good food, sleep and spend time indoors.
- Before you play, set up your safe-words and use them (they’re not just for physical safety, they work for emotional safety too).
- Know your boundaries and practice keeping them. If you overstep them, be kind to yourself.
- Use safer sex protocols and agree them before you start to play.
- Explore your sexual autonomy to have more self-knowledge and to empower yourself for greater pleasure possibilities with others.
- Christmas can be a lonely time for many, don’t assume that everyone is spending their days happily singing along to Wham! If you know someone who needs support, you may want to see if there is anything you can do or connect them with organisations that are available to help over the Christmas period (e.g. The Samaritans or Crisis).
Finally, we wanted to take this opportunity to thank all our contributors and readers for their support during our first year, it’s been a beautiful, wild ride! We are looking forward to a New Year filled with wonderful and enlightening new articles, a printed edition of our magazine and the launch of our panel debate series to celebrate our first birthday in January.
We wish you a joyful Christmas and a juicy New Year!
Editorial Team, sex+